where are you now?

why does love elude me…

Posted on: April 13, 2008

Anima Sola
Pia lorraine
April 24, 2007

Sadness is infiltrating my being, I regret not for the man I just left but for the guy whom I lost for so long. The movement of my heart has been slow ever since he’s been out of my life. I miss everything about him and my heart is yearning for him, but my mind tells me other wise. I thought I am strong enough to avoid him, I thought I succeeded by leaving him but the memory I left still haunts me. I redirect myself with a lot of things but my soul always drift back into him. He impaired me in ways I cannot imagine someone is capable of doing. But he is a part of the past now, a past that I have to forget.

Why does the past still feel like the present? Why does love elude me? How did it happen that my one great love is not the one meant for me? Why does love and pain a never-ending cycle?

There are too many questions that linger in my head, capturing my entire soul and leaving it in a realm of tears and longing.

He is the best evidence of how elusive love can be for he is a reality that I cannot grasp. Every place that we’ve been together, every phrase that we shared with each other it’s all a reminder of how alone I am now. My lonely soul wanders through the night having tears and fear as its companion.

My sensible part is leaving me and I have to cling to my sanity. Years of trying and yet I am still dying.

“We lose the people we love because they are meant to love someone else. We lose them because we are destined to find somebody else. It is a simple fact that is sometimes hard to accept because we are too stubborn to let go of something that doesn’t belong to us anymore.”

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1 Response to "why does love elude me…"

What beautifully poignant piece of prose.

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